The Logotron

Programmed in JavaScript by Daniel Oddon

Note:

It would be possible to modify this program so that the semantic interpreter provides a comment that is more syntactically accurate.

For example:

"ZOODIDACTE giving ENSEIGNE ANIMAL" could yield

"teaching related to the animal world."

There would be another formula. By calling

I the starting index of a word and

J the ending index of a word, one could create a file

S$(I, J) containing a string.

For given I and J, if the register is empty, the program would create the interpretation. If the register is non-empty, the program would display that interpretation. This would allow gradually storing large collections of amusing interpretations, which readers could enrich. The program would then display the author's name for each interpretation. On request, a file would list the members of the Logotron Academy, along with the number of interpretations adopted and integrated into the program. Beyond a certain number of interpretations, readers could be admitted to the Logotron Academy and in turn select the best discoveries. Over the years, one could accumulate a vast collection of hilarious interpretations. For information, a standard Logotron has a potential of 90,000 neologisms (300 by 300).

Who would know how to modify Daniel Oddon's program to give it such capabilities? I personally don't know JavaScript.

STATODYNAMIC: Study of the evolution of stationary states

EPISCODROME: Landing field for bishops

PANSCAPHE: Vehicle capable of going anywhere.

PANGAME: A person who tends to marry everyone

HEMIGAME: Half-married

COSMOTOPE: The place where the universe is located

CHRONOGENE: Describes a situation where time is just waiting to appear.

STEREODOXE: One who holds rigid opinions

MESOGRAPHE: System for writing between the lines

BRADYCERQUE: Short-tailed

GERONTOMACHIE: A fight among old men

I remember having designed (in one of my computer books) a program called

INSULTOGRAPHE,

which automatically generated insults. I could easily retrieve the files. The character sequence was then:

Go away, eh .........

The insult was automatically displayed. I had suggested integrating this device into automobiles, at the back, with an appropriate display. Office variant with a sound synthesizer, for masochists. Another variant, integrated into mobile phones, with a control button.

Which gadget manufacturer will dare to produce (with a simple liquid crystal display bar) a desktop Logotron, to be integrated into anything? Consider solar-powered Logotrons for tombstones. Why not a giant Logotron, integrated into a sculpture? I suggest Logotrons in metro cars or in toilets, to entertain people.

Years ago, I had envisioned a LOGOTRON game, an extension of Scrabble. Instead of letters, players would have word beginnings and endings, and compose their discoveries, which would then be scored by other players.

I invented the LOGOTRON in 1977, on a rainy Sunday. It led to a memorable appearance on the show "Temps X" with my two friends, Igor and Grichka, the famous Bogdanoff brothers. Wearing a pair of tortoiseshell glasses, I presented the "Logotron" (in fact an Apple II, but back then few people knew about microcomputers). The device randomly synthesized words with the sound of a typewriter. Then, from time to time, the device would stop on a word and the display would start flashing.

And then, Professor, what happens?
Well, the word has entered the semantic interpreter's field.
And then, what do we do?

I signaled to a "technician in a white lab coat" (in fact one of my literature students, whom I taught at the university).

Mr. Arondel, would you please activate the semantic module?

The "technician" typed a few keys. The screen then displayed all sorts of things—graphs, anything at all. Then appeared:

Neologism: PANPHOBE
Calculated meaning: One who hates everything.

Impressive. And if viewers are interested in your research, what should they do?
Well, they write to the Institute of Logotronics, Faculty of Letters, Aix-en-Provence, Robert Schuman Avenue, and it arrives.

At one point, the LOGOTRON itself found its name, thanks to the suffix "TRON."

A hoax that fooled eight million people. The university president at the time called me into his office.

Hey, grab your mailbag, there...

The phone never stopped ringing. Linguists wanted to know how we had built our semantic interpreter. There was even a pharmaceutical lab that had developed a new molecule and was asking for a quote to create a name for this new product.

A side anecdote: A sedative typically ends with the suffix "NAL" (like Belladénal, extracted from belladonna). In a pharmaceutical lab, researchers were struggling to find a name for a new sedative. At the end of the day, the director finally said:

Just invent anything, but keep "NAL."

Thus was born GARDENAL.

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